5 Ways To Protect Your Body Peace During the Holidays
The holidays have a way of bringing out the best in people—and sometimes the worst commentary. For many, family gatherings are filled with warmth, tradition, and connection. But if you live in a body that others feel entitled to comment on, these same gatherings can quickly become draining, tense, and emotionally loaded. Nothing pulls you out of the present moment quite like a relative saying, “You look like you’ve lost weight!” or “Are you really going to eat that?”
If you’ve ever found yourself bracing for impact before walking into a family event, you’re not alone. Here are five grounded, compassionate tips to help you navigate body comments this holiday season with more clarity and self-protection.
1. Prepare a Few Go-To Responses Ahead of Time
You don’t owe anyone an explanation about your body, your food choices, or your health. But having a couple of pre-planned responses can help you stay grounded when a comment unexpectedly comes your way. Think of these not as scripts you must follow, but as supportive tools you can lean on.
Some options might be:
“I’m not discussing my body today, but thank you.”
“I’d rather focus on enjoying time together.”
“My body is not up for conversation.”
These responses are neutral, firm, and boundary-setting without inviting further debate. Practicing them beforehand can help you deliver them with more ease in the moment. I know it may sound silly, but yes practicing in the mirror until it feels normal to say these things can help!
2. Set Boundaries—And Stick to Them
Advocating for yourself can feel tricky around those who view boundaries as an attack, especially with family who may be used to commenting on appearance as if it’s harmless small talk. Remind yourself: discomfort doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. Boundaries aren’t meant to make everyone happy—they’re meant to keep you emotionally safe.
You might set a boundary before the gathering (“I’m asking everyone to avoid weight or food comments this year”) or in the moment (“I’m setting a boundary around talking about my body”). The key is consistency. If someone pushes back, you can repeat yourself calmly: “Yep, that’s still my boundary.”
Your boundary doesn’t need everyone’s approval to be valid.
3. Protect Your Peace With Strategic Distance
Sometimes the most protective move is not engaging. If someone brings up your body or food in a way that feels intrusive or unkind, you do not need to stay in the conversation out of politeness.
You can redirect (“How’s work going?”), walk away (“I’m going to grab a drink—excuse me”), or choose to sit near people who feel safer and more supportive. Emotional safety matters. Your job is not to absorb hurtful comments simply because they’re said by family.
Think of distance not as avoidance, but as choosing where your energy goes.
4. Ground Yourself in What You Know to Be True
Body comments—whether framed as “concern,” “compliments,” or criticism—often reflect someone else’s beliefs, insecurities, cultural conditioning, or obsession with appearance. They are rarely about you.
Before heading into a gathering, take a moment to reconnect with truths that support you:
“My worth is not tied to how I look.”
“I’m allowed to take up space in any body.”
“I don’t need to perform health or confidence for anyone.”
Grounding yourself in your own values can help those comments land differently. Instead of accepting them as facts, you can see them as noise that doesn’t deserve to shape how you feel about yourself.
5. Plan Supportive Aftercare
Even if you handle comments beautifully, they can still hurt. It’s human to feel impacted. After the gathering, give yourself permission to decompress intentionally. You might:
Text a friend who “gets it.”
Journal about what came up.
Take a quiet walk.
Do something soothing that reconnects you with your body in a gentle way. (sitting in a position that is comfy, grabbing a soothing sensory item, using gentle movement, hot or cold shower, grabbing a comfort snack)
Remind yourself: “I navigated something hard today.”
Aftercare is often the piece people skip but need the most. You want to make sure you signal safety to your body after your nervous system may have been on high alert.
Final Thoughts
Holiday gatherings can be complicated, especially when family members feel overly comfortable commenting on your appearance. But you don’t have to absorb those comments or shrink yourself to keep the peace. You’re allowed to protect your energy, your boundaries, and your relationship with your body.
Your body is yours.
Your peace is yours.
And you get to decide what conversations you participate in—this holiday season and every one after.
